The Crazy Tree
Life, and the relationships within it, is often about perspective. Your particular perspective in a relationship with someone, be it working, friendship, familial or love, is different depending on how you interact with them. Everyone has some level of crazy in them; some have OCD, some are geniuses, some are in love and some enjoy the squishing sounds that a stabbing knife makes. How much of this crazy you see in a particular person generally depends on the amount and quality of time you spend with them. What gets in the way of this time is barriers, which can be people (like your parents) or physical (like an ocean).
Take, for instance, that neighbour of yours. You’ve probably seen him do something a little crazy; maybe he goes running in short shorts when it’s so cold out your boogers freeze. You don’t know him too well though, so you’re pretty far away from his personal Crazy Tree. Because you’re so far out, he appears lower in the branches. The barrier here would be the walls of your domicile…and the fact that you don’t want to see him in short shorts. Ever.
Another example might be “That Girl” at work. You know, the one that can’t seem to shut up about her gerbil. She’s over in Sales though, and your manager generally keeps a tight lid on things so you can do some work. If your manager is good at it, you’ll never even notice just how much crazy has been kept away from you. But you probably will notice the less subtle ones, like Gerbil Girl there. You’re pretty sure she’s high up in the Crazy Tree, but you’re not close enough to be sure; your perspective just tells you that (I mean really, who names their gerbil Pinky McSparklepants?).
Barriers skew your perspective of how much crazy you see. The closer you are to someone’s Crazy Tree, the more you notice how high up they are. They could be just dangling off of a low branch or they could be swinging in the upper branches, screeching and tossing turds at you. Think about it; how much crazier did your roommate seem when you moved in with him compared to when you just had beers every now and then? Barrier of housing dropped there, letting you closer to his Crazy Tree. That supervisor that seemed really cool during the interview for grad school? Well, now that you work in his lab, he’s a turd slinger. Barrier of unfamiliarity dropped.
Where am I going with all of this? Show some appreciation for the barriers in your life, particularly the human ones. Once they’re gone, you might find yourself in the Crazy Forest in the middle of freaking Crazy Town and wondering how all this crazy just snuck up on you. Hint: it didn’t; your perspective just changed.